Thursday, January 19, 2012

Choose your destiny! - By Marie-nicole


The dictionary meaning of the word ‘destiny’ implies that there is a lack of control over the outcome of your future. Although we do not have full control over everything that takes place around us, we can surely do our best to steer our life in our chosen direction.

In the lead up to a new year, the desire to reflect on and assess life is common. New years resolutions are made and decisions to change one’s situation often set in motion. I am not terribly big on setting new years resolutions myself as I find I assess enough of my life the entire way through a year, especially since as a micro business owner I have in the past fallen into the trap of doing what comes my way even if it is not what I truly wished to be spending my time doing. Which is why I now think it is essential to stop reflect and assess regularly on what you are spending your time, money and energy on. If you don’t like how your life has turned out or the direction your business is heading then it is up to you to make changes and realign yourself with where you would like to be heading. These changes do not need to be huge, but they do need to be significant to your desired outcome.

The one thing I do like to do at the beginning of a new year is set myself one major goal for that year, giving my year a focal point. Usually it is something that I have had hovering in the back of my mind or written in my journal many times over, and when I see that a year ahead may be well suited to realising that dream, I bring it to the forefront and make it my goal for that year.

In order to set realistic achievable goals for yourself I think it is important to take the time to get to know yourself and what it is you really want to be doing with your life; right now, in the near future 
and the distant future. Keep in mind that goals may change over time. Just because 10 years ago I wanted to travel the world while photographing for a living does not mean that I still want that now as my situation has changed, now having children and a different set of priorities. I still have a great desire to travel and a passion for photography, but the priority of providing my children with a sense of belonging, the security of a home and a lifestyle where as a family we grow our own food and live sustainably, means that lengthy trips overseas are not as feasible as they were 10 years back. That is not to say that I should abolish that dream, but rather understand what the essence of that dream was about. I think it may be about the sense of adventure and discovery which is something that can also be experienced closer to home, in shorter trips.

This realisation came to light when my husband and I went to Chicago and New York City a couple of years ago. We did a lot of our discovering on foot and when we got back to Australia I decided to
treat my day trips to the inner city areas of Sydney the same way. I park further away from my desired destination then walk the last partof my trip which enables me to really take in the smaller details of an areas culture while discovering shops, cafés, street art and beautiful little gardens that I would have missed had I driven right up to the curbside of my desired destination. In the last couple of years we’ve also taken a few more road trips and treated them in much the same wayas our US trip. Adjusting your dreams to your current situation shouldnot mean loosing the essence of what you are about.
 
Apart from knowing yourself when setting your goals in order to choose your own destiny, I think it is equally important to understand how the people around you are affecting you and your ability to realise your dreams (or your family’s dreams). Some, no matter how close to you they are, may simply be a negative influence because they themselves do not believe that they have a say in their own destiny. They may be the type of person that blames everyone but themselves for their misfortunes. I am not saying that you should cut ties with these people entirely, but I think it is extremely important to engage with people that lift you up and encourage or inspire your personal or creative growth and development. When times seem tough you will draw from the energy theyprovide you. At other times you can be their source of positive energy when they need it. Having this kind of support will be invaluable toyou staying positive about the possibilities that life can offer you if you are open to the opportunities that are out there just waiting for you to embrace them.

So I would like to encourage you to steer your life in the direction you would like it to head... there is no use spending unnecessary energy on blaming others for what you have not achieved or what you do not have... choose to make it happen, realise your dreams, dream up new ones and live the best life that you can live!

Image: by marie-nicole
Dream catcher: www.teawithagypsy.esty.com

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